Said it Before

When times are difficult and everything seems out of order, its so easy to dwell on the negative things. Sometimes it is down right selffulfilling wallow in your pitty and sorrow. That was the perfect picture of me this past week. I got my first true reality check of how hard nursing school is for me. I failed 2 exams in a row literally and it crushed my heart. But why? Not because I studied my heart out, but rather because I hate to look like a failure. I have always been a 4.0 student but the reality is that I am not in highschool or college anymore with a young bright mind. In fact, I am bogged down with all things motherhood and being wifey. I LOVE spending time with my family and giving that up is really hard. I need to get disciplined again.

My glass is half full because I am here...I am in nursing school, I am in block 2 with only 2 more to go, I am able to be with my newborn more than expected, I can pump milk for her, I have those I love to care for her when i need it, and I have a husband that lets me do all of my dreams. So who am I to screw it up by half assing my studies and giving a 24/7 pitty party? We deserve this win so I gotta get it together some how. I will conquer this battle starting today. With lots of prayer of course LOL