Thump, thump, thump

Today was our initial prenatal appointment! I am so elated right now because I am just starting to wind down, removing some of my heavy load, and focus on this pregnancy. So...We are having a home birth, if its Yahwehs' will! Its such a comfortable feeling to have my midwife coming to our home and doing everything here. I really like her vibe a lot. Today was your standard H&P, bloodwork, and financial stuff. BUT, we got to hear the babies heartbeat! She said the heartbeat was very strong for 11.5wks, so I am feeling very calm.

Its interesting because with my first pregnancy I was very gungho and persistent in what I wanted. I am feeling similar this time around, but much more laid back. My biggest challenge is working on my mental strength because the last weeks of my pregnancy were very stressful trying to battle against the medical system and their beliefs about breech birth. Yahweh blessed me to deliver vaginally and that was my ultimate desire. Now, I must work on dispelling any fears in that area. I mean, I am very confident in my ability to birth naturally at home, but I think I want it so badly I am fearful that something might stand in the way of it.

Birth is unpredictable; however, just as my first child taught me patience, percerverence, and relaxation...I am sure this child will be filled with just as many lessons. I am ready and willing to receive these lessons and change my life for the better.